The "Graduation System" of Self-Improvement: The Trap of Metacognition

What you'll learn in this article

• How to use metacognition in stages
• When to let go of self-observation
• Flexibility is necessary for true personal growth
• "Addiction to awarenessHow to graduate from
• This content is recommended for those who are struggling with self-improvement and those who are currently practicing metacognition..

Prologue: The paradox of observation that the universe teaches us

Questions?Why will the universe forever remain a mystery?

I was a space lover, and one day I suddenly realized something.

SpaceBecause we continue to observe the universe under the assumption that it is a mystery, the universe will forever remain a mystery.I wonder if that is the case.

And then, I was shocked.

Haven't I been observing myself in the same way?

Chapter 1: Metacognition: The Good Student

MetacognitionSimply put,Ability to view oneself objectively" This refers to.

It's like floating in the air and observing another version of yourself.

This ability, at first, I was an extremely good student

Examples of the effects of metacognition

• Impulsively saying things you shouldn't say → "Oh, I'm getting emotional now" and control it.
• Repeating the same mistakes in relationshipsSpot patterns and make improvements
• Being swayed by unconscious beliefs → "This is due to childhood trauma"

Awesome! Exactly!Self-Improvement Honor Student.

My problem-solving skills have improved, and I can now give quick answers to questions from others.

However, good students have their own worries.

Chapter 2: The Good Student Disease of Awareness Addiction

Just like a high-achieving student who keeps studying more and more and ends up burning out, I"Addiction to awareness"It had become like this.

Live broadcast in my head

Even while you are talking to someone,

😰 "Oh, I'm nervous right now."

😟 "This tension may be transmitted to the other person."

🤔 "I did it well! But if you think you did it well, that means you don't usually do it well."

It was like I was watching a live broadcast in my head.

Then I realized, isn't this the same structure as space observation?

[Space Observation】

The universe is "Mystery"
↓
Forever a mystery

[Self-observation

I call myself "incomplete"
↓
The eternal feeling of "not having enough"

Chapter 3: Knowing when to graduate

The problem is that we tend to stick to the same methods forever.

Metacognition is indeed a wonderful tool.

But, just like tools,When to use it and when not to use itThere is.

Analogy
You need a screwdriver to tighten the screws, but you don't need to hold onto it after the screw is tightened.Rather, it becomes a hindrance.

Three stages of self-development

[First stage] Metacognition training period

[Features】

• subject: Impulsive behavior and poor self-understanding
• the purposeAcquire basic self-control skills
• method:In-depth self-observation and pattern analysis

[Second stage] Metacognition utilization period

[Features】

• subject: I have come to understand myself to a certain extent and have made some progress in improving.
• the purpose: Deeper self-understanding and improved problem-solving skills
• method:Exploring the unconscious and resolving trauma

[Third stage] Metacognition graduation stage

[Features】

• subject: I have gained enough self-confidence
• the purpose: Achieving true unity and natural presence
• method:Stop observing and just accept that it is

Chapter 4: The Feelings of Letting Go

When I stopped observing myself, it felt surprisingly good.

It felt like a sense of freedom, like taking off an uncomfortable suit that I'd been wearing for a long time.

[Changes after letting go】

• A sense of unity with yourself is created
• The boundaries between people will naturally dissolve
• Synchronicity occurs frequently
• The timing is perfect

The reason is that it was born from observation.A sense of separation between "observer" and "observed"Because it's gone.

The universe, ourselves, and other people were all originally one.
By observing, I was simply forcing myself to separate them.

Freeing myself from the concept of judging made comparisons unnecessary and made things easier.=^_^=

Chapter 5: Flexibility is the most powerful skill

The most important thing for self-development isThe ability to realize, "Maybe this method is no longer necessary"Maybe.

Common Traps vs. the Ideal Approach

Common traps	⭕ The ideal approach
I heard that meditation is good for me, so I'll keep meditating for the rest of my life.	Choose what you need right now
I heard that strength training is good for you, so I train 365 days a year.	If it works, move on to the next step
I heard that metacognition is good, so I analyze myself endlessly	Sometimes letting go is an option

[Key Takeaways】

Growth isn't about having more tools, it's about using the right tool at the right time.

Bonus: Learning "age-appropriate growth strategies" from muscle training

In fact, the use of metacognition is very similar to strength training.

Strength training in your 20s vs. strength training in your 50s

era	The right approach	What to avoid	Important points to note
20s	High Intensity Training Pushing the limits	A reckless challenge that ignores the basics	Improving basic physical strength
30s	Efficiency-oriented Training for specific purposes	The same unreasonable burden as in my 20s	Sustainability
50s	Emphasis on maintenance Flexibility and balance	Training as hard as when I was younger	Injury prevention and quality of life

What if you were in your 50s and doing the same training as you did in your 20s?
→ Joint pain, delayed recovery, and counterproductive results

The same goes for metacognition! There is an appropriate amount for each stage of development.

🏃‍♂️ 【In the case of muscle training:

• Early Life: Push to the limit
• middle age: Emphasis on efficiency and continuity
• Middle Age: Emphasis on maintenance and balance

⚠️ Overdoing it without considering your age can lead to injury

🧠 【In the case of metacognition:

• initial: Thorough self-analysis
• middle periodObservation as necessary
• maturity periodFreed from observation

⚠️ Over-analysis without considering the stages is mentally taxing

Wisdom to avoid putting the cart before the horse

❌ An example of putting the cart before the horse

Strength training:I started it for my health, but I pushed myself too hard and hurt my knees.

Metacognition:I started this to make myself feel better, but over-analyzing it has left me exhausted

⭕ Ideal example

Strength training:Adjust it appropriately according to your age and physical condition, and continue for a long time.

Metacognition: Adjust the intensity according to your stage of growth and eventually let go

💡 Common Wisdom

"What worked for you yesterday may not work for you today."

Whether it's muscle training or metacognition, you need to honestly look at where you are and improve accordingly.Flexibility to tailor your approachThis is itTrue Maturityis.

Consider not only actual age but also "years of experience"

	Strength training experience	Metacognitive Experience
beginner	Emphasis on basic form (Any age)	Emphasis on basic awareness (Any growth stage)
Intermediate	Menu by purpose Load Adjustment	Deep self-understanding Modifying a pattern
Advanced	Emphasis on maintenance Preventing injuries	Freedom from Observation Natural Being

[Important takeaway】

・If you're 40 years old and new to weight training, start with the basics.

・Even if you are 25 years old, if you are an advanced metacognitive person, you can reach the stage of letting go.
・"Maturity in that field" is more important than actual age.

Epilogue: Where are you now?

If you are now

・"Don't know much about yourself?" → First, learn metacognition
It's important to start with basic self-observation to understand your own patterns.

・"I'm tired from analyzing myself too much" → Try relaxing your observation a little
Don't strive for perfection, and sometimes it's important to trust yourself and take it easy.

・"I can trust myself enough now" → Take the plunge and let go
Graduate from observing to just "There isLet's experience the perfection of "

The important thing is to look honestly at your stage.

and,"Thank you for everything, but it's okay now"Don't miss the opportunity to say.

Just as the universe will forever remain a mystery, so too will we forever remain a mystery.Growing up" There is no need to be.

Sometimes it's best to just trust in the perfection of being.
Because maybe you were perfect all along.

What is "Just Being"?

"Just being" = accepting the present moment as it is, without analyzing or judging it

in particular

❌ Analysis Mode】

• "Why am I nervous?"
• "What is causing this feeling?"
• "How should we improve it?"

⭕ 【Just being mode】

• "Oh, I'm nervous.(Just noticing)
• "Now I have this feeling(No judgement)
• "That's fine"(accept)

To give a familiar example:

🌅 When watching the sunrise

• Analysis: "Why is it beautiful? What is the wavelength of the color?"
• Just be: I just feel the beauty

🎵 When listening to your favorite music

• Analysis: "Why do I like this song?"
• Just be：Just immersed in music

🐱 A cat basking in the sun

• I don't think about anything, I just feel the warmth
• The past and future don't matter, there is only the present

in short

A state in which the boundary between the thinking subject (observer) and the thought object (observed object) dissolves and becomes one.

It's not something to understand with your head, it's something to experience.

Meditation and contact with nature can help you feel better.Very natural and peacefulis.

Concrete steps to put it into practice

Step-by-step checks you can start doing today

[Self-checklist】

📝 Check your location

• □ I often become emotional and regret things(First stage)
• □ I understand my patterns, but there are still areas I want to improve(Second stage)
• □ Excessive self-observation makes me tired(Late stage 2)
• □ I basically trust myself(Third stage)
• □ Being natural in relationships with others(Third stage)

Specific actions for each stage

🔰 Recommended for those in the first stage

• Record your feelings in a diary
• Make meditation and mindfulness a habit
• Set aside time to reflect on when you become emotional

📈 Recommended for those in the second stage

• Exploring trauma and the subconscious
• Use of counselling and therapy
• Analyze patterns and implement improvements

🌟 Recommended for those in the third stage

• Make a conscious effort to stop observing
• "Just beEmphasis on experience
• Take time to feel one with nature

FAQ

Q. I don't know when to stop using metacognition.

A. If you feel like self-observation has become a chore, that you're not discovering anything new, or that the act of observing itself is stressful, it may be time to let it go.

Q. I'm scared to let go. I'm worried I'll fall back.

A. That anxiety is whatMetacognition is still needed" It might be a sign.

If you have enough self-confidence, you won't be afraid to let go.

Don't rush, and cherish the current stage.

Q. What if I have a problem after I get to the third stage?

A. It's perfectly fine to temporarily revert to metacognition if necessary.

Flexibility is paramountEssential.

Use your tools, not let them use you.

Summary: True growth begins with letting go

🎯 Key points from this article

1. A phased approach: First, build basic self-confidence through metacognition
2. Letting go at the right time: Once you have a good understanding of yourself, stop observing too much.
3. Trust in existence itself: Don't analyze, just accept what is.
4. The importance of flexibility：Instead of continuing the same method forever, change according to the stage

🚀 Get started today

Start practicing identifying the steps you need.

And when the time comes, have the courage to move on to the next stage.

Letting go is the new phase of your growth journey.

"From the beginning, you were perfect"
The journey to remember this truth may be what self-growth is all about.

If you found this article helpful, please share it

This may help others who suffer from a similar "notice addiction."